I had my bike stolen and nearly didn't report it because usually nothing ever comes of it but I thought what the hell, and sure enough got the usual line about how unlikely it would be that they'd ever recover it.
Two days later I got a call to say that it hadn't actually been stolen after all, but rather some officers on the night shift had picked it up themselves as felt it was "at risk of theft". It had been sitting in one of their interview rooms the whole time.
Oh, I meant bicycle. And it was still attached to the large clump of bricks I had used as a "theft deterrence" when the perplexed officer on duty took me to it. He actually had the cheek to grumble about not being able to interview criminals in the interview room while it was full of my crap.
Two days later I got a call to say that it hadn't actually been stolen after all, but rather some officers on the night shift had picked it up themselves as felt it was "at risk of theft". It had been sitting in one of their interview rooms the whole time.